Abu Umamah Al-Bahili (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said,
“I guarantee a house in Jannah for one who gives up arguing, even if he is in the right; and I guarantee a home in the middle of Jannah for one who abandons lying even for the sake of fun; and I guarantee a house in the highest part of Jannah for one who has good manners.”
Argumentation stems from our desire to be right. To prove others incorrect and fuel our egos. If we bow out of an argument, even if we are wrong, it demonstrates a higher control of ones self then someone who is blinded by their emotions always proving their point. When we look back at the exchange between shaitan and Allah, shaitan is found arguing with Allah. His ego leads him to think that he is right and this furious desire to prove his point led him to an eternity in Hell.
We see this trait of rage and dominance in animals. They don’t have intellect like we posses. It is because of this intellect that we have the capacity to enter into the realm of Angels, but this intellect can also lead us to join the low ranks of devils. Allah tells us He has created everything in balance. Our anger is balanced by our intellect. If you remove the higher function of our brains we become just like animals. Our emotions dictating our every move with nothing to restrain, or keep us in check. It is this balance that we must tip in favor of our angelic qualities. Buddha once said, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”
It comes down to whats more important to you. Is it being right? Is it winning an argument? Or is it instead love for Allah (swt), because if we enter into every argument with that in mind we wont ever transgress the limits. We wont get enraged by differences in our Ummah’s understanding, we wont fight until our brothers and sisters have broken their bonds with us. We should be like an oasis in this desert of life, such that when someone comes to us with a problem we comfort and help them, not burn and leave them in more pain. That might mean sometimes being wrong even if we’re right, it might mean backing down even when our views are correct, it might mean being humble in the face of arrogance, InshAllah it might mean the difference between being cast in Hell or entering Paradise.
– Omar M