Breaking Definitions (Prt 2)

You will notice that people are very quick to put others in boxes. Categorizing people like socks, sorting them like buttons. This has become so common that its second nature to most of us.  If you’re black you must be a drug dealer.  If someone is Muslim they must have a beard and want to kill everyone. If you are shy you must be weird.  You’re fat you must not care about your health. The list goes on and one, and whats worse is that we let people categorize, and define us.

Look back at your childhood. No matter if you were popular or not, you were living a definition that was stamped on you. This “title” that was given to you whether it was loser, ugly, popular, slut, freak, nerd , fat ass… these false titles defined you. Why? Why did it matter so much what someone else said about you, did it change who you were? No! No matter how much someone may call you something, it only DEFINES you if you LET IT.

When I was in middle school I was defined as a loser, my “friends” would make fun of, ridicule, and make me feel like a loner. I didn’t have any friends, didn’t feel confident, constantly felt self-conscious about my weight, and overall had a very muddled understanding of who I really was. It wasn’t until I began realizing that I was living someone else definition of who I am did I begin to break through these confining walls.  Once you harness the power of yourself you will be able to shatter these mirrors of vanity.  Don’t let people tell you who you are and who you can’t be. Doing so gives others way to much control over your life. Instead exclaim to yourself who you are, DEFINE yourself and live well outside the labels put on you. Become resilient to the insecurities of others. Understand that if someone tells you who you with all this passion, you must ask yourself why they are not using that same determination to remind themselves who they are. People, you see, are much more comfortable pointing out flaws of others then they are in themselves. It takes courage to face yourself in the mirror, stripped of your ego, looking your insecurities dead on.  A coward finds solace in projecting their flaws onto others.

People love to tell others what they are, what they can be, who they can’t become, what they will accomplish, and how much they will fail. This is human nature. I believe it is a coping mechanism that helps people with weak hearts go to sleep at night. They like to remind themselves how much control they have on others, when they can’t even rule the kingdom of their hearts. Emotions overrule them, and passions run high.  To define oneself means to understand the self. To be in total control of your mind, body and soul. To know and firmly believe that only you will dictate your outcome. You will project the best you for people to see. If you have defined yourself as shy, ugly, not skinny enough, not smart, then that’s exactly what people will see. If however, you exhume confidence, greatness, positive energy, and most importantly a total harmony with yourself, that’s what people will see in you. And if they don’t, then you have nothing to worry about, because you are now living life for yourself and not for anyone else. Be the captain of yourself, and you will find much ease in navigating the treacherous waters of life.

– Omar M


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