Understanding our Parents

Bismillah.

Parents. In this world of choose what you want, they are the one thing we can’t chose. But they are also the only people in this world that would quite literally take a bullet for us, especially our mothers. We tend to forget the sacrifices our parents have made for us. We forget the pain our mothers feel because of us, how her body gets drained of all its energy just to support us. Imagine, for 9 months having to watch your body change, to feel pain in the morning, evening, afternoon, to give up whatever you were busy with before to take care of this new baby.

As humans we don’t put ourselves in others shoes. We don’t see what others have done for us. Think when you couldn’t even clean up after yourself who was there, our mothers. When we couldn’t walk who held us up so we could take our first steps, our mothers. Who slaves day and night, cleaning and cooking so we are fed, our mothers. Who used to wake up in the middle of the night when we cried , our parents. Who paid for the education that got you a job, your father. Who sits up worrying late into the night when we don’t call home, our mothers. It is our parents, our mothers and fathers that literally have spent all their energy, their blood, their sweat, and their tears for us. Imagine never having been born, would your parent’s life have been the same? Would our dads still have had to work so hard so he could save money and put us through college, to buy us clothes, food, a car? Would he have had to work until the hairs on his head turned white just so we can have unlimited texting, so we can have the latest gadgets, so we can live comfortably?  Would our mothers have had to stand on her feet for hours and hours cooking meals for us?

Thinking about all the things our parents have done for us and continue to do for us helps us understand that whatever they do it’s because of their love for us. If you had something that you loved, that was yours, that your blood ran through, would you be so careless as to let it wander out into the world without any second thoughts? Would you let the thing that means the most to you get into trouble and not say anything? Of course not! Look at how we care for our materialistic devices. Our iphones, and ipads. Misplace one of them and our world goes into this panic, fearing the worst has happened. Now if we have such attachments to these things why do we get angry when our parents worry when we aren’t to be found?

Its about thinking at a deeper level. There have been many many many times in my life when I have yelled, gotten angry, said and done things to my parents that I wish now I could take back. But how amazing is it that even so, even after all the mess ups, the stress, the pain that we bring to them at the end of the day our mothers and fathers still love us. Our mothers still cook for us, they don’t stop caring for us even if we yell at them, even if we bring pain to their hearts. That’s the love a mother has for her child. Its why when a man asked the Prophet “O Messenger of Allah, who among the people is the most worthy of my companionship?” The Prophet replied “ your mother. The man said, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man further asked, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man asked again, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: Then your father. (Bukhari, Muslim).

InshAllah this serves as a reminder to those going through a rough patch with their parents, or those of us who forget to call our mothers and tell them how much they mean to us. There will always be times when we don’t understand our parents, just like there are times they don’t understand us, but it is in those times that we must take it upon ourselves to be even more understanding. To realize that it is because our mothers think from their hearts that they can sometimes be irrational. That it is because our fathers want us to be more successful then them that he yells at us. Trust me, as a kid who has brought a lot of stress, pain, and trouble to the front steps of his parents house it is now when I reflect back that I realize everything they said, and did was for my best. At the end of the day I would do anything it takes to protect them, to cherish them, and to always love them.

– Omar Malik

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